


Learning to live

by legends_saga



Category: Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: mention of war
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:01:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29295561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legends_saga/pseuds/legends_saga
Summary: The Solo family makes their first trip to Kashyyyk since the war has ended
Relationships: Jacen Solo & Jaina Solo, Leia Organa/Han Solo
Kudos: 9





	Learning to live

"You're not coming?" Han asked, eyes fixed on Tahiri even as he made room for Jacen carrying his bags into the Falcon.

"I don't know. Kinda sounds like a family trip to me." 

He almost rolled his eyes at her statement, making a few steps down the ramp until he was close enough to rest his hand on her shoulder. "Which is the exact reason I asked you to come."

"Tell her I'll project a holo post to her head if she constantly keeps forgetting it!" Jacen yelled from inside. 

***

Several hours later, Tahiri sat across Jaina, fully submerged in their second round of Dejarik, Threepio making some more or less useful commentary on the side. She still felt some headache whenever the droid spoke, a small pang of anger, but it was bearable, now that she knew what was causing it. In all honesty spoken, she'd actually grown to appreciate Threepio. During many sleepless nights, he'd kept her company, telling some stories about little Anakin that soothed her when the feeling of missing him became overwhelming.

  
"Sithspawn!" Jaina sighed, already forseeing her loss after one of Tahiri's creatures was healed by the Ghhhk.

The girl shrugged. "First rule: Always be two steps ahead."

"For the next two steps, 128.327 possibilities exist." Threepio announced. "Given the capacity of a human brain, it is quite unlikely for you to forsee-"

"Haven't we talked about metaphors?" Leia chimed in, settling next to the two girls. "Not everything we say is always meant literally." Observing the circular board,

Leia still had to admit that Tahiri had built up a large advantage against her daughter.

"Cannot believe this is one of the first times you've ever played. I watched Dad and Chewie do this for ages, and I still can't quite figure it out." She laughed, erasing the board with a swift move of her hand. "I surrender."

"Third time's the charm." Tahiri remarked with a smirk.

"Later. I hide from my embarassment by joining dad for a while."

And as quickly as that, she left the girl and her mother to themselves.

"What's bothering you?" Leia asked softly, taking her daughter's seat. At Tahiri's surprised expression, she explained: "You've got the Solo frown. Looking like the world is falling apart any minute."

"Haven't managed to sneak the war out my bones." In all honesty, she doubted the feeling how dread would ever vanish. The war had robbed her of her friends, her identity, and the only person who ever came close to being family. The memory would haunt her for years and years to come.

"I've seen that crease the last few weeks. This one's deeper." 

Tahiri sighed. "I just... Kashyyyk is like a second home to y'all. Especially to Co-", she stopped, correcting herself "to Han." 

Leia nodded understandingly, then smiled. "You know, Han speaks his own language sometimes. He doesn't want to overthrow you with the kind of... well, love and affection he usually shows towards his kids, because he doesn't want to dishonor the people who raised you." She continued, watching as Tahiri bit her lip.

"Kashyyyk is really important to all of us. The fact that he wanted you to come with us, is him saying he loves and appreciates you, and he tries to do a good job in whatever relation you want us to be with you."

"But don't you get it? This is what worries me. You do so much for me, and I could never return the favor."

No. Instead I was the one who your son gave his life for twice. 

"It's something you get used to when having children." Leia laughs. "Besides, its not true. You might not understand this now, but the greatest pleasure in life is seeing others grow. I see a lot of growth in you."

"Not sure if it's growth... or a mere change."

"One does not exclude the other." Leia got up gently resting a hand on the girl's shoulder as she made her way back to her husband. "You'll see."

One thing, Tahiri clearly did see - and that was the overwhelming beauty of the city. Embedded in trees, everything seemed peaceful and sleepy if you ignored the rough destroyed patches of war. Ironic, wasn't it, for the Yuuzhan Vong to destroy almost the only place in the galaxy that could at least partially follow their lifestyle. The Solo's all moved in an almost terrifying unison from one part of the jungle planet, seemingly knowing all trees and branches blindly. 

"We used to climb here for hours when we were kids. Used to drive everyone crazy." Jacen fondly remembered, winking at his sister. 

"Not as funny as it sounds if you find a seven year old playing with poisonous animals being absolutely unbothered."

"At least I wasn't hanging upside down in some twigs proving I could do a backflip."

Tahiri raised her eyebrow. "Jaina or Anakin?"

"Both." Leia chimed him. "The real question is who ended up with the bruised ankle and who ended up with a deep scratch barely missing their eye." 

Washing some droplets of water from her face as they passed an old forrest, the blond-haired-girl blushed. If she closed her eyes, she could still imagine Anakin's features in front of her, the tiny streak of whiter skin just above his right cheek still prominent. As she opened them again, she met Han's gaze, gifting her a smile that didn't fully reach his eyes.

Tahiri couldn't blame him. Last time he'd been here, he had burried his best and closest friend. Albeit only having known Anakin a fraction of the time-span, she could tangibly feel the pain. Like a part of your soul was ripped from your body and shattered forever, too many pieces lost to repair it fully. Then to add the weight of loosing his youngest son out of all the people that should outlive you... happiness was harder to come by after losses like this.

Maybe that's why she was so surprised to find his face brighten with a honest smile as they reached Malla's circular hut, the tall Wookie woman wrapping his arms around him in the tightest hug.

She growled something, to which the man only responded: "Yeah, you too."

The procedure was repeated with Leia, then the twins, until Malla merely looked at her, waiting for her agreement to share a familar hug, too.

"She says you look just like she imagined.", Leia translated fondly.

"That's... a compliment, I guess. Especially coming from someone I've never heard anything but good about."

"Cheesiness will only bring more food on your plate, and the portions certainly are no joke." Jacen remarked, receiving a slight pat against his back of his head by Malla. 

The entire interaction made her feel so much more warm and welcoming than she could ever have imagined - and she was starting to get used to that feeling again. To enjoying the brightness of little moments where it was okay to stop drowning in sorrow. She was learning.  
Learning to live in a world without Anakin, however impossible that seemed. 


End file.
